This weekend was such a challenge. He has begun calling names when he is angry. Right now it is Fatty. All my training says ignore it and not react to it. But when he is shouting it in the grocery store, I want to hold up a sign that says, he doesn’t mean it. He is just going through emotional struggles. Sometimes I can’t ignore it and I send him to time out saying we need to talk nice to each other. On good days I ignore it or if it is a calm moment I change the conversation and distract him. He must have called me fatty at least 50 plus times today alone. (more…)
Fostering to Adopt and Tough Times December 28, 2008
Wow, what a journey and it hasn’t even started. I don’t want to discourage people from doing this. But you definately have to be patient and flexible. I accepted a little boy. I was so excited about him. I was told the beginning of November about him. It took 3 weeks just to meet him for the first time. The first two times the foster mom was a no show. And I haven’t seen him since. It really frustrated me to no end. I finally have a date to begin transition, but not until the end of January. That will be the next time I see him. About 2 months from the first time I met him. Seems to me like starting from scratch again. He won’t remember anything about me. He will determin how long the transition will take. And I am fine with moving at his pace. In the first meeting we had no worries about the biological parents wanting him back. So I thought of him as a child to adopt. As of my last meeting, the father has said he wants his son. So now he will only be coming to my home as a foster child. It could take up to two years for everything to fall into place for him to be adopted. Now i’m torn on what to be to him. Does he call me mommy, does my nephew consider him a cousin, And what will this do to his stability and security in life? This is part of being a flex family. I signed up for this, and so far I am ok with it. I saw a foster mom in the hall who was crying because she brought her little foster child to court with her and his biological parents saw him for the first time and decided they wanted him back. She has had this child since he was an infant and was there to see the parents rights terminated since they hadn’t seen or heard from them in well over a year. Things can change just like that. Now she won’t be able to adopt him and is devistated. Again, I still seem to be ok so far.
Probably because he hasn’t been in my care yet.
(more…)
Adoption/Foster Care October 7, 2008
Just a quick update. I have been licensed, and I have been briefed on the contract. I sign the contract today. I am already allowed to be matched. And this is the scary part. This is a life time commitment. Not a passing phase. For some of you, your children are chosen for you. They are just born to you and you love them like crazy. I feel weird that I am picking the children. How do I make a wise decision?
There is one little girl that is ready for adoption. I can’t seem to get her top five needs. She is older then I origionally wanted, 8, but there is something about her that seems like a fit.
There are two other little girls. Sisters. Perfect in age, 3&4. Just what I wanted. But they have been diagnosed with Fetal Alcohol syndrome. This is something that affects them their entire life. I don’t know much about it, and that is why it is a bit uncertain for me. But God may make this decission because a relative is intersted in adopting them. And they get first choice.
How do I know which children to adopt? Part of me just wants them all. Part of me is scared to make the wrong choice. Biological parents don’t have to go through this do they?
Anyways, any prayers would be fabulous. My spelling is horrible this morning. Blah.
Sierra Association of Foster Families August 24, 2008
SAFF Is a great organization I want to let you all know about. There are lots of ways we can help Foster Families here in Reno. You can click on the link to find out more, but here is some of what I know.
Donations. Saff Takes donations of monetary value for things like sports activities/lessons for the children, conferences for the foster parents to attend which are like workshops to learn new ways to help your foster children thrive in such a crazy world, school supplies, tutoring and education, as well as for other reasons.
They also take donations of New Toys or gift cards for The SAFF Birthday Closet. The Sierra Association of Foster Families maintains a selection of new, donated toys and birthday gift items for foster families to choose from for every foster child in their home. SAFF usually has a selection of gift cards, movie passes or other appropriate items for teens in care in addition to games, sports related items, personal electronics and clothing items they may choose from. (more…)
Names June 19, 2008
So I have just about finished my foster Kitty time. They go back to the Nevada Humane Society to get fixed, microchipped, and shots, tomorrow, June 20th. Then out the same day to get adopted. This group has been so much fun! A great distraction for frustrating times. I decided to name them. I thought this would be easy, but being the personality I am, I wanted just the right names.
Here is what I came up with:
This is the Mama Cat. She is only 2 years old. I named her Shanti which means Peace. She is really a peaceful cat, very loving, sweet, and gets along well with other cats. She is also very tolerant, like most moms. I am also hoping that someone will bring peace into her life by adopting her soon. Shanti is also a character from Jungle Book 2. She reminded me of this character because even though she is the mom, and is sensible, she is also playful and young, and brave. Just like Shanti in the movie.
This is the black little boy. He is the bravest of all four kittens. He was the first to not run when I entered the room, and the first to explore outside of the room. I thought Baghera would be a cute name for him, the black panther in Jungle Book, but after watching him more, I thought Mowgli suited him better. He is way too playful and adventurous. Not very cautious like Baghera was. (more…)
Great News! June 19, 2008
ALL the kids I have been interested in adopting now have a new home! Praise God!
I know I said I wouldn’t look anymore, but I did. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Maybe the kids all have daddies now though. That would be cool. I am still waiting on a home study. Life in the fast lane. God loves to make me wait…
Plans of Hope Dashed June 8, 2008
I was writing to a friend in WI and telling them about my plans to look into the three kids for adoption, when I saw that they are not accepting Home studies for them at this time. That means someone else is looking at them, they found a match, and they are no longer available for adoption. (more…)
Foster Care Classes Complete And I’m Already Fostering June 3, 2008
Well, I am finally done with my classes. They were quite an eye opener. Foster care would be great to do, but I never got to talk to a “single” person doing Foster care. All the people we spoke with were married. Currently, I am looking to adopt. Here is a link to the kids I am hoping will make a match with me.
https://www.washoecounty.us/wcss/CARD_includes/bios/59_RussellJasmyneAngel.pdf
I am almost done with the application so I can turn it in hopefully by Friday. Then I will be waiting for a home study, then I can inquire about the children. If you are interested in seeing some of the other children ready for adoption here is the link
http://washoecounty.us/socsrv/socsrv_child_adoption_recruit.html
When you get to this page, click on the female, male, and sibling groups to see the children waiting for forever families. Maybe they will inspire you to adopt?!
The most eye opening lesson has been reading a required book called:
- Twenty Things Adopted Children Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew
Foster Care Classes Update May 12, 2008
I am well on my way to finishing these classes. Haven’t been late since that first class. I go through a few different emotions at each class. One, they had us pretend to be a single mom with 3 children watched by an elderly great aunt. One child gets sick, my great aunt could now be exposed if I send my child to her. However, rent is due, and we need food. I get paid hourly. They gave us four choices to make. I didn’t like any of them. But we had to pick one. It took me a while to pick. I was one of the last ones to pick an option. I was angry, and understood the preassures of some single moms. Either choice cost us our home, or our great aunts and the childs health. And all choices would bring a visit from social services. It was crummy to say the least. (more…)
