Smlwoman\’s Weblog

“Waiting for that golden moment when fear and desire die, and only the unspeakable reality of love remains. “

Foster to Adopt Step 2 February 1, 2008

Filed under: adoptions in reno,foster care in reno,my thoughts — smlwoman @ 8:56 am

Well, I called the Reno social services and got the information I needed.  I received a packet the other day in the mail.  Reading through it I got a little nervous because it said classes for adopting special needs children.  But after I a bit I understood that these children are in foster care for a reason.  They have special needs weather it be from abuse, drugs, alcohal (I hate trying to spell that word), emotional, or physical.   I have worked with children with downs syndrome, RETS, Terrets, Autism, Huntingtons (by far the saddest for me), and many others.  My nervousness is not in taking care of a “child” with special needs, but taking care of an “adult” with special needs.  I wonder if I am able to handle taking care of a child that will ALWAYS need my care.  I hope you all understand what I mean.  It is a selfish thing to think, but I can’t help it.  It does scare me. 

On the positive side, I could see myself being pulled in by the heart strings to foster several children.  I would never pull apart siblings.  Does that mean I will only foster the “only child” ?  Not on your life.  I am the one who would be crazy enough to adopt the five brothers and sisters who don’t want to be seperated.  That would be five of them that could team up against one of me.  But it wouldn’t matter.  Anyways, I have been thinking about what type of child, and I really want a little girl.  Now not all little girls like to be “girly” girls.  So I guess I want a girly girl.  But if she has a brother or two, I would want them too. 

I am already thinking of classes I could put them in like gymnastics, and dance, and sports of their choice.  Or music!  And having them help me decorate the room! Anyways, these have been my thoughts that get me excited. 

The ones that get me scared are will they like me?  Will they learn to love me?  I am a strict adult.  Will they find me overbearing or caring?  Will I make them laugh as well as cry?  Can I handle it if their parents take them back?


4 Responses to “Foster to Adopt Step 2”

  1. jose Says:

    Even with all the what ifs… it still seems worth doing. Here’s another, what if they grow up to be taller than me? That’s one to take seriously. 😉

  2. smlwoman Says:

    Oh my goodness, I hope they are taller then me, especially the boys!

  3. genevie Says:

    I watch you take care of C and J and you do so great! I think you will be a great foster parent.

  4. One of the disheartening things we learned during the adoption process is that many times some of the most horrible things that happened in your adoptive child’s past won’t come out until AFTER the adoption. You might find 6 months into the process that your child was sexually molested and carried that with them the whole time, afraid to tell anyone. Our social worker told us that it was all too common for parents to call the social worker up after placement and say, “did you know…?” How terribly sad.

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