Smlwoman\’s Weblog

“Waiting for that golden moment when fear and desire die, and only the unspeakable reality of love remains. “

God Had a Plan From the Beginning January 30, 2011

Filed under: adoptions in reno,Children,Life as a Mom,my thoughts,Time with God — smlwoman @ 10:28 pm

I was asked to write about some of my past on here. Suggested starting after highschool. Which is a decent place to start. But as I look back on my life, I realize that it really started some time before High school even began. I will jump through the years so don’t worry that you are about to read my entire life story in one post.

What makes me the person I am today? I think it is and has always been God. Even before I knew Him. When I was a little girl I would line up my stuffed animals and dolls and pretend they were my students. I would write out math homework, hand it to each doll, then do each page, then correct each page. I wanted to be a teacher when I grew up. And I did become a teacher when I grew up.  A preschool teacher.

Something I thought was interesting, but what I remember even more, is that at that same age, I told my parents I wanted to adopt children. I wanted to have 10 children and I would adopt them all. We were living in an apartment in Reno at the time with my parents and my brother was only 2, So I was 10 at the time. And I am on my way to adopting children just like I wanted to 31 years ago.

What has changed is the reason for wanting to adopt. At ten years old, I had seen my mom’s soaps and I knew that having a baby hurts like heck! I heard those women scream like there was someone ripping them in half! I was NEVER going to have a baby if it meant that kind of pain. Therefore I would adopt all my kids!

I am not sure why I wanted 10 kids at that age. Maybe it was the idea of always having someone to play with. I remember when my brother was in my mom’s tummy, I was so excited to always have someone to play with! We would play games and climb trees and have all kinds of fun together! However, I was 8 and when he was born he couldn’t do anything! Sure he was cute and all, but he could not be a forever playmate. Being 8 years apart has been an experience of us both not knowing each other as we grew up. He was heading into the fun years and I was heading into the selfish years. So maybe that is what started me thinking of 10 kids.

As I got older, I still wanted to adopt, but I would have been happy with at least one of them coming from my tummy. That never came to pass, but that is a different post.

I never took Early childhood education classes in Highschool or any babysitting classes. After high school, I went to work in retail, and wanted to own my own cosmetic jewelry store. I had great plans for it! But even then kids were a big part of that dream too.

It was going to be located on Rodeo Dr., but cater to both the rich and the average person. I wanted an ear peircing booth all set up with only kids in mind. Bright yellow walls, with large polka dots, a large mirror, and several different colored piercing guns, an inside trick I used to help kids get the second ear pierced, and a poloroid camera to take pics of the kids as they get their first earings. Off to the side of that I had a large fenced off area, using a white picket fence, that had a retired nurse watching over it. Lots of toys and a nice reading area. This place was also just for the kids. There was a method to my madness. Watching parents and kids in the store I worked in, I realized that kids need something to do. They would take our earing trees and twirl them around and earings would fly all over. Mom would get frustrated and then leave without buying anything.
In my dream store, mom’s could put the kids in the fenced area to play, a retired nurse was there to watch them, mom could still see them from any point in the store, and would have the tranquility of shopping and spending much more money. A relaxing time for them, and a much nicer profit for me.

I even took a small business management class in college. This dream never came to be, but again, I found it interesting how even then, God had me at a place where I wanted to plan around Children. What happens next is where my life of working with children begins, but I will save that for another post.

It is interesting how God was leading my footsteps all this time. I still did not know Him yet. And I would not realize how much He was in my life until a few years later. And I fought him every step of the way. He has made me the person I am today. I truly believe what I do with children is a gift from Him. A supernatural gift that not everyone would want. But it is my gift and I am forever grateful for it! .

Poverbs 16:9 The mind of man plans his way, But the LORD directs his steps.

Something you may never know, or understand, until you know Jesus and look back on your life.

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